Im hurting bad. No one to talk to. Nothing orchestrated yet. Normally id call a special person but its her birthday today and i really don't want to make it a bad day for her. These last 12 years have opened my eyes to stuffs i hope no one ever has to see. I yurn and intend to come out victorious. Either way i am doing my best to make the most of it. My wildest dream ever is to come through all this and just feel like a normal human. Oh how id appreciate every little breath, ray of sunshine, breeze and even those silly little ego comments form 'others. Kill me or heal me, ive already taken my position. I wish i could show someone the inside of my mind. Youd be comically surprised that im either smarter or stupider than you thought. I mean how can i not lol at that. I NEED the stars to align, enough cash or those special magical people to show up in my life. I would say i relate most (atm) with a prisoner of war.
